Business is Amazing, fun and has the ability to serve society in a major way. It is complex however. And you can easily make many mistakes – the worst mistake however is the ones that don’t necessarily cost money but will cost you your family.
On the other side of today’s world many people make the opposite mistake destroying their passion and purpose in life for more hours in home in which they are typically unfocused, unpresent and anxious about work or money.
I’m not going to tell you how many hours you should work and how many you should spend at home. Not just because I believe the answer is different for every person and is different as you go through the changing phases of your life – but also because I don’t yet have the exact answer for myself.
But in the past 10 years of doing business and several years of being married with kids – I’ve learned some very powerful lessons I would love to share with you today.
Lesson #1: things are going to change
many single entrepreneurs like working very long hours, personally for a few years i was working 14 to 16 hours days on 7 day workweek.
When then it changed, i learned to manage my time and made more money working 12 hours a week – in that time I actually met my wife.
Then when I found an opportunity to grow my business by almost 1000 percent I worked 10 hour days again for a year and that stopped when my first son was born. Then it changed again when he went to kindergarten, again when the second son was born and a few times after that.
So be open to changes.
Lesson #2: You cannot and should not try to please anyone in this decision.
If you will work more than you want to please your customers, business partners or employees – you will resent them and have major regrets later in life for the things you missed.
If you will work less than you want to please your significant other or your kids you will resent them, and blame them for your lost dreams which might even be worse.
Also as you know, as a business owner you can work for 16 hours and it’s still not enough and as a father even after a long time of amazing fun when you will leave for work you still might get a sad face from your beloved child or a grumpy face from your partner.
This might very well be one of the most important decisions of your life – you should do what you believe is right – and this way it will serve everybody’s best interest as i’ll explain in lesson number 3
Lesson #3: time is not nearly as important as presence.
Being home for 8 hours in front of the TV or with your smartphone is not nearly as impactful for your children as 2 hours of full presence and undivided attention.
Just like in a burst of focus and energy at work you can do a full week of work in a few hours.
It’s not just about time, it’s about presence and attention.
Your kids might or might not remember how many hours you were at home but they will remember the moments that matter.
And your business dreams will not be fulfilled by smashing the clock getting in first and leaving last – but by the quality of decisions and work you do.
If you are thinking about work when you are with your kids and thinking about your sofa at home when you are at work – you are doing it wrong.
Lesson #4: many times it’s neither work nor home.
Not alway, however many times I found that what helped me bring more presence both home and work was spending time doing neither.
Exercising, eating healthy, doing passion projects, helping other people just for helping them or meeting up with friends and relatives – can help you get just that.
Lesson #5: be unreasonable
If you are going to take reasonable actions you are going to get reasonable results, do you wanna know what reasonable results look like? Watch the average person who gets paid the average pay, is generally dissatisfied from his work, is tired when he gets home and gets divorced when the kids are in the right age to do that.
If you want to grow your business, have an amazing relationship in your family and generally live a BEYOND BETTER life – you should probably take unreasonable actions.
Think about what you really want and act to achieve just that!